Kate – Page 113 – Daily Graces

The yard is Ben’s job. He’s the lawnmower guy, weed wacker expert, and general yard king. He was able to take our yard which was mainly weeds, rocks, and dirt – basically low on grass and high on skinned knees. He tore it up and loved it back to life. We have a great backyard now where our kids can play safely and our dog can run around, free to bark at any shadows that may threaten the realm (he is an 18 pound dog that believes he is capable of taking down a German Shepherd).

But, when Ben is gone, the yard falls to me. I’ll freely admit, and Ben knows this, I am not as attentive as he is to the yard. I always mean well when he is away. I promise to keep up with the watering. I swear that this time I really will mow more than once while he is gone for a long trip or deployment. This time, this time I will gather enough courage to use the weed wacker.

I don’t know what it is about the weed wacker that scares me. Probably the noise. It’s not a tool I spent any time with growing up. The yard was not on my list of chores. I can garden and weed by hand quite well. But hand me the power tool and I freeze up a bit. Ben has shown me how to use it and he is so patient with me. But I still avoid it.

How do I mow the lawn then, you may ask, if I am hesitant around a weed wacker? We have a push mower. No noise, no gasoline, no tugging or revving. You just push it from one place to another and the grass is mowed. Easy peasy. Why can’t they make weed wacker’s like that?

Ben was about about to come home, just a couple days away. After all my promises, you would think that the yard would be in great shape. Of course, it wasn’t. Actually, it was terrible. I should have taken a picture to show you just how bad it was. The weeds were high, to the point that when I tried to mow with the push mower they just would lay down and then pop back up. I knew that the only way to beat them back was with the weed wacker (and hind sight telling me that if I had actually kept my promises they never would have gotten out of hand in the first place.)

But I am a procrastinator. It’s one of my fault that I’ll own. I can find an excuse to get around anything I don’t want to do. Some people choose to do the unpleasant or difficult task first to get it done and out of the way when they are energized and motivated. More often than not (I am working on this and am getting better….slowly), i channel all that energy into many other productive things, convincing myself that these are just as important and should be taken care of first. Then, by the time all the other projects are done, I have no time, energy or opportunity to do what I really had to do.

And so there I was, just me and the weed wacker and a window of opportunity. Clare had just fallen asleep and since she usually only sleeps for 20-30 minutes during the day – she’s a terrible napper – I knew it was a small window. I managed to convince John and Rosie to play in the backyard. I was so focused on those tall weeds that I actually did a lot of things out of order. I didn’t pick up after Max (another one of those neglected tasks since the kids had been playing mainly out front with some new neighbor friends). And crime above all, I didn’t actually mow before starting to use the weed wacker! I know, for all you lawn people, this is a rather ridiculous proposition. But like I said, I was so driven to conquer my task that logic was kind of on the back burner.

I got the weed wacker started. I even remembered which way all the stuff was going to shoot out and tried to stay going in the right direction. Of course, this couldn’t be simple and easy. Less than five minutes in a 5 inch length of wire shot out of the bottom – the weed wacker had reached the end of its cord. Excellent. If I was uncomfortable with a weed wacker to the point of avoiding it at most costs, I certainly had no idea how to change out the cord. I am almost thankful that I knew I had such a short window to get this task done. It meant I didn’t have time to stamp my feet and come up with reasons to not figure out this hiccup. Instead, I flipped it over and figured it out. Thankfully, my ever thoughtful and prepared husband had a new cord waiting in the yard closet.

The task did get done and what a wonderful feeling to look out over the yard and see that it wasn’t a forest of weeds anymore. I always have a feeling of accomplishment and pride when I manage to finish a task that I was not looking forward to doing, especially when it is something around the house.

So, you may be wondering why I’m telling you about my trials with the weed wacker. As I was wacking those weeds, I was thinking about my husband’s love of the yard. It made me think about how God charged Adam to cultivate, till and care for the earth. We were designed with the care of the earth in mind. I was somewhat ashamed at my lack of drive to take care of our yard. I know that God isn’t calling me to forsake my kids dinner so that I can individually pick each weed out of our lawn, there are priorities in our lives. But, maybe the yard – and by extension our home (cleaning is another cause for procrastination for me. I’m probably procrastinating cleaning something as I write this and am doing it again as you read it), should occupy more space in my priority list.

Everything given to us is a gift from God and we are supposed to take care of it. We are stewards, we are not owners. A steward manages the owners property or goods. She is accountable for how she uses them and is rewarded for a job well done. I have been given this beautiful family, a beautiful home with a fantastic backyard and a loving husband. I am responsible for helping each flourish and will be held accountable for how well I serve them. My reward is the smile on my kids faces when I was done with the weed wacker. They weren’t necessarily smiles because I had conquered the weed wacker (John had his hands over his ears the whole time because of the noise), but I’ll choose to think they were anyway.

This is by far one of the things that I believe God enjoys teaching me the most. There is some kind of phrase or story that goes something like this: If you pray for it, God is going to give you opportunities to practice it. In my case, I pray often for patience and God hears me every time. I know this because I have lots of opportunities (and challenges) to practice growing in patience.

Some lessons in patience are bigger or harder than others. Ben is on a unique deployment schedule. He deploys for 2 months at a time, but sometimes is only home for only 2 – 3 months before he has to deploy again. And while he is home, he has to go on any number of trips that can last from 5 days to unknown – literally. Each time he is gone, especially when its a trip, I can’t know for certain when he will be home. I have to be patient and have trust. Some trips this is easier than others.

My lessons in patience aren’t always this large. Just the other day, I found some beautiful meyer lemons at one of our local grocery stores. I was so excited. *Back story* We have a eureka lemon tree in our backyard and I got my first harvest a few months ago. I had so many lemons I spent quite a bit of time looking at different things to do with them. I found something I had never heard of before – preserved lemons. It is a staple in Moroccan and North African cooking (neither of which is familiar to me, but I love to try to make new things). Just salt and the lemons in a mason jar. Even though my lemons weren’t the kind typically used, the recipe said my eurekas would be an ok replacement for the typical meyer lemons (who knew there were so many varieties of lemons!) For 3 weeks! After patiently waiting for these beautiful lemons, they were done. I had a recipe and couldn’t wait to start. Got my lemons, got my roasted garlic, and my fettuccine (I went Italian, that’s my wheelhouse). I figured I’d get braver and branch into the Moroccan after I knew these lemons were good. On my trip back to the refrigerator with the remaining lemons, time stopped. In the next moment, the jar, and all of those precious lemons, were on the floor. The glass had shattered.

I was devastated. My dinner was delicious. But my lemons were gone. All that waiting, and for what? Ben was deployed at the time so he didn’t even get to taste the fruits of my waiting. I haven’t attempted to make them again, it takes so long for them to be ready, and if they can be gone that quickly, is there really a point?

Then I saw those meyer lemons (the kind that the recipe would be amazing preserved). There was no question, I immediately grabbed them. Because even though I was still sore about my clumsiness, I knew I had to do it again. I can still taste that meal and am willing to wait the 3 weeks to have it again. So, presently we are a few days into our wait. Ben is not home, but he will be by the time they are done. I’m so glad that God gave me another opportunity to wait patiently.

It’s incredible how patient we really can be, when we know what is waiting for us at the other end. I know that those lemons are going to be amazing, because I’ve tasted them already before. Being patient this time is much easier already than last time. What is cool about this experience of patience, I think, is that I’m choosing to see it as a lesson from God. It makes my waiting and patience more than just an act of willpower, it is a way I am training my soul and my heart to be patient in the bigger things, especially in times when I am waiting for God’s timing to reveal His plan for my life and our family.

If my little story got you interested in trying to preserve your own lemons, I used this website: http://www.daringgourmet.com/2014/04/08/how-to-make-preserved-lemons-moroccan-middle-eastern-cooking/

And if you’re interested in the dinner I made after you practice your own patience skills, check out: http://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-fettucci-5560. I grilled some chicken and tossed that in as well. Enjoy!