We have the amazing ability to be able to share our thoughts and opinions with the world via the internet. While not all of us have a million followers on Instagram or whatever Twitter is called these days, the things we share on the internet last. Time and again we are seeing how mistakes in the past are coming back to haunt politicians of all flavors, celebrities, and other more famous individuals. Post a picture, it’s there for ever. Say something overly negative about a particular person you have a problem with, it can be found at a later, likely very inconvenient, time.

Jesus’ advice in today’s Gospel is so important, and not because we are concerned about who is going to uncover what. There are, of course, many wonderful things about the interconnectivity of the internet, the ability to dialogue with people in other places beyond even your own country, and the way knowledge can be shared across a massive number of people. It’s amazing to fathom the positive possibilities the internet can bring.

However, there are downsides. One of the big struggles I have with the internet is the impersonal way it allows us to relate to one another. I can’t see a person’s hurt expression if I make an unkind comment. I can’t read facial expressions to understand what is sarcasm and what is a misunderstanding. I don’t see tears welling in someone’s eyes at hurtful comments made by others. These social cues are nonexistent in the online atmosphere.

Jesus’ approach is so different from how disagreements get handled online. Jesus says to go to the person in private and have a conversation with them. Find out if there is a misunderstanding, apologize if needed. Take the time to seek that person out and make them feel valued and heard so that the disagreement can peacefully be reconciled. If this doesn’t work, then include others into the conversation.

This one-on-one approach is vital for the building up of families and communities. How many of us have been doubly hurt when a situation got aired out in front of others instead of remaining between the two people who it pertained to? How often have you seen a group turn on a person who they know nothing about, but because the grievance got posted online now that person is being hit from all sides?

The next time you have an issue with someone, consider Jesus’ words. Are you seeking healing and reconciliation by sharing about the struggle in a public space, or just looking to vent and possibly due harm to that person’s reputation? Is the issue important enough for you to take time out of your own schedule to meet with that person, or share a phone call? If you were on the other end of this event, how would you want it handled?