Circumstances

No one lives with perfect circumstances. Things might be going really well, but there is always something in your life that could be fixed up. Even in the lives of Mary, Joseph, and Jesus – two of whom were perfect people in that they were without sin – even they lived in imperfect circumstances. We don’t get to pick our circumstances but we do choose how we respond to them. The Christmas season highlights a few different biblical characters and the way they chose to respond to unusual, perhaps even seemingly imperfect, circumstances.

Zachariah, the father of John the Baptist, responded with fear and doubt when told about his coming son by the angel. He relied on his own understanding and was not open to the possibilities the Holy Spirit could create. Mary, on the other hand, received a message from an angel about a baby as well. But in her case, she remained open to the action of the Holy Spirit, being willing to cooperate with God’s plans even though she did not understand them. She was filled with the Holy Spirit and even before Jesus was born we are able to hear how both Mary and Elizabeth (John the Baptist’s mother) speak inspired words to one another. Both Mary’s fiat, her “yes” to God, and her Magnificat spring from her faith and trust in God’s love.

The Holy Spirit still speaks to us today if we are attentive. Sometimes in the words of others, sometimes in the words that come out of our own mouth. Sometimes, even in our imperfect circumstances.

This fall, my mom was diagnosed with a glioblastoma tumor in her brain. This is an aggressive type of tumor and it was less than 48 hours between diagnosis and brain surgery to remove as much as possible. Our whole world was completely turned upside down. Thankfully, the surgery was as successful as the doctors could hope for. There is still a long road to go, and we don’t know the twists and turns that will come.

Before my mom was diagnosed, she had some speech and word finding issues. After surgery, the doctors said she could have a hard time with speech due to the location of the tumor. We have some funny stories of those early days and the word switches, misses, and adaptations my mom came up with as her healing began. Every so often, she still slips. However, there is one particular slip that I believe is Holy Spirit inspired.

While the chemo my mom was prescribed are daily oral pills she can take at home, radiation had to happen at a cancer center. Every weekday for 6 weeks she went to the center for treatment. After a few visits and settling into a routine, she began calling “radiation” “adoration.” Obviously, these two things are definitely different. And yet, as we talked about it, I can’t help but feel there is some kind of Holy Spirit inspiration between the switch.

What happens in radiation? For a few minutes (really, less than 10, it’s rather remarkable), the person has to lie in perfect stillness while the mechanisms and machinery delivers the radiation treatment to a specific and carefully aligned area of the body. There isn’t anything my mom can do to make this process more effective or efficient except to be faithful to the treatment process. If she didn’t go every day, the effectiveness would greatly diminish. If she wasn’t compliant to the doctor’s recommendations for staying active even when she was exhausted, to try her best to eat as well as she could even when all she wanted was saltines, her body wouldn’t be as strong as it could be to continue fighting this invisible enemy.

What is adoration? Adoration is coming to adore Christ. It is taking time out of our day to place Jesus at the center of our life. Typically, people are pretty still during adoration, with sitting or kneeling being the predominant postures. Adoration is an opportunity to open ourselves up to Jesus’ action in our lives, to let him highlight the areas of our life in need of his mercy, his healing, and his love. In Adoration we can receive inspiration for how to live our lives, what actions should we do or avoid that will help us more fully follow God’s Will. We faithfully show up to adoration, but it’s God’s action that is on display.

From this light, there is a lot in common between radiation and adoration. If you are willing, I’d like to invite you to pray for my mom, Mary Kay, and for her healing. I’d also invite you to pray for my dad, Steve, as he walks this journey with her. My parents have both asked for prayers specifically through Chiara Lubich’s intercession. Long-time readers will hopefully recognize Chiara as the founder of the Focolare Movement that our family is a part of. Below is the prayer of intercession that is officially recognized by the Church. Chiara is a named Servant of God but cannot move forward in the canonization process without miracles associated with her intercession. God willing, my mom can be one of those miracles.


Eternal Father, source of Love, and of every light and goodness, we give You thanks for the charism of unity given to Chiara and for the remarkable witness to the Church and humanity that she gave of this charism, remaining faithful to Jesus Forsaken.

Grant us, O Father, through the action of the Holy Spirit and the Word lived in the present moment, and in following Chiara’s example, the grace to contribute together with all people of good will to the fulfilment of Your Son’s will: “That they may all be one!”

Humbly we ask You to grant us, Your children, to live in mutual love and in love of all so as to rejoice in the presence of the Risen One while, in communion with Chiara and through her intercession, we ask You, if it be Your will, the grace for the complete healing of Mary Kay Jennrich from brain cancer, through Jesus and for the glory of the Most Holy Trinity.

Amen

If you’d like to learn more about Chiara and the movement, I have three resources for you. First is the film Love Conquers All that can be viewed on Formed.org. Many parishes subscribe to this streaming database. Check with your local parish if you are unsure if you have free access or not. The second is the primary website of the Focolare Movement. Third is the main media resource for the Focolare which has videos, articles, and other resources you may be interested in.

Daily Graces. kktaliaferro.wordpress.com

Emmaus Academy Course Review

I think we can easily forget that there isn’t an end of learning when it comes to our faith. We don’t “graduate” or “finish” in terms of faith and knowledge of God. God is immeasurable, infinite, eternal, outside of time and space. Even when we die and come into His full presence, there will still be things outside of our understanding because we are not God, nor will we ever be. 

While there is no true end to learning about what we believe, that doesn’t mean there isn’t a journey worth pursuing. We are immensely blessed with a faith that is rich in meaning, tradition, and history. We also believe in a living faith. The Holy Spirit is still actively guiding the Church as a whole as well as each one of us individually. Mysteries of our faith are still being revealed, apparitions are still happening, saints are still being made. Even if someone, somehow, managed to learn all the things that have been discovered about our faith to this point, they still would not know all of it because there is more the Holy Spirit is waiting to draw us into. 

If you haven’t guessed yet, I love to learn and I especially love this adventure of learning the deep mysteries of our faith. I was so pleased to be able to review a new course from the St. Paul Center’s Emmaus Academy entitled, “Full of Grace.” The Emmaus Academy is a learning platform that has a wide range of video based courses on a variety of topics especially pertaining to Sacred Scripture. It also has a few book based series where you can read through a modern text and engage in reflections guided by the author. Finally, there are a growing number of special presentations on specific topics. So far, Dr. Scott Hahn has a video series that walks through the Our Father and this July a new series will be released titled, “The Catholic Table.” Emmaus Academy has monthly or yearly subscription options.

“Full of Grace” is a Marian focused series of 12 videos, ranging from 22-40 minutes (only 1 40 minute video, the rest were 35 minutes or less). The videos are given by Fr. Daniel Maria Klimek, TOR, a professor of Mariology at Steubenville University. At the conclusion of each video there is an optional 5 question quiz which highlights some of the overall concepts discussed in the video. 

There is no time specific requirements for these courses. You are working through them on your own and at your own pace. However, at the start of the course, I appreciated that you were shown a window which projected how many hours a week you wished to dedicate to your course and if you stuck to that plan, when you would expect to conclude. While not a binding document, it was a nice touch for emphasizing that this course should be a priority in your schedule. 

As a mom of 6 kids, I don’t have a ton of time to sit down and devote 30 minutes to a video that delivers a lot of information I want to retain. These aren’t background noise videos. Each one was full of interesting content pertaining to Mary’s role in Scripture, background information about the Garden of Eden and how Mary is part of the fulfillment of God’s promises to Adam and Eve, the history and development of Marian dogmas, Marian apparitions, and even Mary’s role in spiritual warfare. This was a packed course.

The interface is very clean and easy to navigate which I appreciated. Even more, I appreciated that the course kept my place in the video I was in the middle of, even if I was switching between my computer and my phone. This was a huge plus for me because it happened often that I would start a video on my phone, want to stop to take a note and get distracted by this, that or the other, and then return in the evening on my laptop. There wasn’t any trying to remember the time stamp or which video was I in the middle of again. 

This was a very dense course. Excellent, but dense. I would highly recommend a notebook because there will be a lot to write down as well as a number of new authors you might want to check out. If you haven’t had the opportunity to study your faith in a more academic setting, this course might be a little overwhelming. But, because these are pre-recorded videos, you can pause or rewatch as you need so you can fully explore all the concepts presented. 

Overall, this was an excellent experience for me. It was so good to spend this time focusing intently on the Blessed Mother and how special she is for the Church, as well as for me personally. 

Daily Graces. kktaliaferro.wordpress.com

A Not Series

Well dear readers, it seems my ideas about an ongoing series of series is perhaps not panning out. I do intend to do something with the Colors in the Focolare movement, but I need to learn more, ponder more. That being said, I am not without inspiration to continue writing. We are just back to the old “series” – a.k.a. as the Holy Spirit inspires me so shall I write. Which is what I’m bringing you today.

Presently, I am helping to pilot a new VLCFF (Virtual Learning Community for Faith Formation) course on Mary in Scripture. Thus far it has been an enjoyable course. In these first weeks we have been studying typology. Typology, or the study of types, analyzes Old Testament persons, events, themes and motifs that can be seen as prefiguring New Testament counterparts. Some examples would be Jesus as the New Adam, Mary as the New Eve, the Eucharist and the Passover, etc. In this course specifically we are focusing on Mary and Marian types.

We spent quite a bit of time looking at the Gospel of John and how he used types to demonstrate Mary’s role within salvation history. The Wedding at Cana featured prominently in our discussions. We are using an excellent resource by Scott Hahn, “Hail Holy Queen: The Mother of God in the Word of God,” (I highly recommend if this topic is of interest to you). In it, he goes into great detail going through the types found within the Wedding of Cana scene. Below is part of a comment I shared within our group discussion:

It is enlightening to consider Mary as the New Eve, and how both had a choice to make. Eve, to take the fruit or not. Mary, to try to solve this problem on her own or to hand it to her Son. As a mom, I know how easy it is to “just do it myself.” To let my kids help, each in their own way and according to their abilities, means that often, things aren’t necessarily done exactly to my specifications or perceived correct manner of doing things. Instead of trusting God to reveal knowledge and His plans for the couple, Eve “did it herself.” Mary, on the other hand, turns to her Son and provides Him the space to do and reveal as He wished. 

Ever wonder what it’s like to have the Holy Spirit speak to you through your own words? That was me as I finished writing this. I wonder if I got the smallest taste of what it was like for the Gospel writers or other biblical authors. To have written something not totally of your own inspiration. The words were yours, but somehow, they came from someone else.

These words are ones I’ve needed to hear, and needed to hear, and yes, needed to hear over again. And they are words that, obviously, I haven’t been able to effectively teach myself. I needed them to come from someplace else. A Godly place.

Whenever I hold on too tight, I cannot hold onto anything at all. The more I try to control a situation the harder it becomes to manage the smallest details. A concrete example.

I have tried for many moons now, years actually, to have better control over waking up on time. Yes, we’ve had lots of babies and rocky sleep and teething and nursing and all the things. Yes. But deep down, I’ve known that there were definitely periods of time between the hard that I could have been rising earlier than I was. I wanted to be able to get up before everyone else, to have that morning time with God, to have time to stretch and exercise, to read a book, to listen to the birds, to have a cup of tea, to…..whatever! Just to get up! Of course, I’ll probably never get all those things done in a single morning before everyone else wakes up (I mean if I started at 4am maybe but since I was having trouble with 7am I’m thinking baby steps were a better idea).

Then, I heard a powerful idea. Coming full circle, it’s something Chiara of the Focolare said. It is from the end of a meditation on what Jesus did for each of us in coming to earth and sacrificing Himself so that we might go to Heaven. I will put the meditation in full below. But the short phrase that I have carried with me is, “For you, for you Jesus.” All that I do, I ought to do for love of Jesus. Before opening my mouth to speak, before choosing what work to do next, before disciplining or praising a child, it’s all for Him. This little phrase has radically altered so much of how I act, when I remember to say it frequently. And I can tell when I haven’t been.

How does this relate to getting up in the morning and relinquishing control? I no longer get up and out of bed for me. I get up for Him. When the first words on my mind when the alarm goes off are “For you, for you Jesus!” I’m immediately turning myself outward. I am getting up for Jesus. To be with Him in prayer, to stretch my body so I can serve Him and my family better. Some mornings I am getting up to simply read a book or to knit a few rows of a project. But I am getting up and out of bed most days of the week before any child is awake or at least allowed out of bed. I am not perfect but I feel the habit forming. This wasn’t something I could do on my own, I had to let it go. I had to find a different purpose.

So now, I find myself trying to order my day around this phrase. For you Jesus, I will cheerfully go about my chores, knowing that when I work cheerfully the work is done more efficiently. For you Jesus, I will chase Nathan around swim lessons because the skills the confidence his siblings are gaining in the water are worth his pterodactyl screeches. For you Jesus I will help Ben cook tofu nuggets (yes, really. They were my idea but Ben made them…and everyone ate them!) because it is good for our family to continue broadening our palate and appreciation for all kinds of food. For you Jesus, I am typing this blog post instead of knitting the shawl that’s sitting on the floor at my feet waiting to be loved, but I felt the Spirit’s promptings and instead of ignoring them, I am full of peace.


Here is Chiara’s reflection in full. I do not have the reference for where and when she wrote this, unfortunately. I found it in a collection of meditations titled, “Heaven on Earth: Meditations and Reflections.”

Speaking of Jesus, Paul writes, “…and he gave his life for me” (Rom 5:8). Each of us can repeat those words of the apostle: for me.

My Jesus, you have died for me, how can I doubt your mercy? And if I can believe that mercy with a faith that teaches me that God has died for me, how can I not risk everything to return such love?

For me…Words wipe away the solitude of the most lonely and give divine value to every person despised by the world. Words that fill every heart and make it overflow upon this who either do not know or do not remember the Good News.

For me…For me, Jesus, all those sufferings? For me that cry on the cross?

Surely, you would never give up on us. You will do everything imaginable to save us if only because we have cost you so much.

You gave me divine life just as my mother gave me human life. In every moment you think of me alone, as you do of each and every person. This – more than anything in the world – give us the course to live as Christians.

For me. Yes, for me.

And so, Lord, for the years that remain, allow me also to say:

For you.

Daily Graces. kktaliaferro.wordpress.com