Tag: Scripture

The Will of God

Published on by Kate2 Comments

I have a tattoo. I don’t think I’ve shared that here. It’s on my wrist, as you can see, and it references Deuteronomy 30:14. Last summer, Deuteronomy 30:10-14 was the First Reading one Sunday. On that day, I felt these words of Scripture pierce my heart in a way I never had before. This is the passage in full:

Moses said to the people:
“If only you would heed the voice of the LORD, your God,
and keep his commandments and statutes
that are written in this book of the law,
when you return to the LORD, your God,
with all your heart and all your soul.

“For this command that I enjoin on you today
is not too mysterious and remote for you.
It is not up in the sky, that you should say,
‘Who will go up in the sky to get it for us
and tell us of it, that we may carry it out?’
Nor is it across the sea, that you should say,
‘Who will cross the sea to get it for us
and tell us of it, that we may carry it out?’
No, it is something very near to you,
already in your mouths and in your hearts;
you have only to carry it out.”

Deuteronomy 30:10-14

The last part, about carrying out the commands of God, was what struck me. God’s Will isn’t so far away I have to strive to find it. It is not too mysterious, not some lofty thing I cannot attain. It is already written in my heart. Do I have the courage to carry it out?

So many times in my life I have allowed myself to become trapped by the grandness of God’s plan and how it is too big for me to see my part in. While this is true, God’s ways are not my ways nor are His thoughts my thoughts, and yes, His grand design for the whole world is beyond my comprehension, that does not mean I don’t know anything at all. I don’t know where God will take me in 10 years, in 5, in tomorrow. What I can know is God’s Will in this present moment. How? Jesus told us in last Sunday’s Gospel reading and in so many other places in the Gospels:

Love

Love your enemies. Love your neighbors. Love yourself. Love God. Act out of love for God. Pray because you love God.

What do you need to do, now, in the present moment? Love. And in the next moment? Love. And in all the moments that follow? Love.

This is HARD! Especially when love looks like cleaning up after a sick child in the middle of the night, or forgiving a colleague for a hurtful comment. Love is sacrifice, love takes courage, love is selfless.

I can give a recent example.

Ben had left for a 3-4 week trip and we were only on day 3. The day Ben left, Nathan (the 1 year old) threw up twice, once in the middle of the night in his bed. He was fine for a day and then was sick again the following. The rest of the kids missed their dad, were tired from a week of school and other activities, and generally needy. Gabriel, the 3 year old, was especially insistent for every moment of my attention he could get. And I just couldn’t take it. I was snappy all morning, harsh when I didn’t need to be, impatient and generally awful. I knew it and I chose to lean into selfishness instead of following Deuteronomy’s advice.

Our big 4 kids had piano practice so they were out of the house for 2 hours. I let Gabe and Nathan watch some Bluey (of course, Bluey!), and I sat down with my coffee. The reality of the morning and my behavior hit me. I was so discouraged. I almost went and got my book to distract myself and get a break from it all.

Then I felt it. The little nudge, the random thought that you don’t know where it came from. “Don’t run away, sit here. Sit here and then do something to make it right.” So I did. It was probably the first moment I truly tried to do God’s Will all day. I sat, and then came the next nudge, “Write to them.” I got out 5 cards and I wrote apology notes to each one of my kids (Nathan excluded, I just gave him extra hugs). I apologized, I asked for forgiveness. I also let them know, according to their ages, how one specific behavior was not helping our family thrive. I asked them to think on it and see if it could be a place to work on. I told them I loved them.

I left the notes on their pillows and went peacefully to read. For about 30 seconds because it was time to turn off Bluey but that’s ok. I had followed God’s Will for those moments, my cup was being filled with grace and His Love.

I’d love to say we had a beautiful day after the kids read their notes. I’d love to say they had marked improvement in behavior, that I was was gracious and gentle from that moment forward. They did not, and I was not. But it was still better. I reigned myself in faster, I spoke more calmly. It was easier to make the right choice faster, even if I initially made the wrong one. I had become more attentive to God’s Will in the present moment because I had practiced it earlier.

I have grown so much in my trust in the Holy Spirit since hearing this reading. It has changed my relationship with God and encouraged me to form a deeper bond with the Holy Spirit. I chose to get the tattoo because I want to keep these words ever present with me, “God’s Will is already in my heart, I have only to carry it out.” This is not a lesson I will ever be done learning.

God has grand designs for each of us. Perhaps we have already seen Him working in our lives, perhaps we are wondering when it will all begin. No matter what God’s larger plans are, His perfect Will for each of our individual moments is the same: Love.

P.S. As a woman and mom, I know I have gotten trapped in the lie that everyone else needs to be served before I can take care of myself. Self-care is a big topic is popular society and it is important. We do need to take care of ourselves, but in a way that does not lead to selfishness or entitlement. It takes practice, it is a work of discernment. If you struggle with the line between no-care, self-care and selfish-care, take it to prayer. Ask the Holy Spirit to pay special attention to this area and to inspire you to rest how and when you need to rest, and to recognize when your focus on rest is inhibiting your ability to do God’s Will.

Daily Graces. kktaliaferro.wordpress.com

To Rise Up

Published on by KateLeave a comment

Jesus is Risen! Alleluia!

For Lent this year I tried to spend time every day reading through the Gospels with my Word on Fire Bible. This Bible is gorgeous and full of so much goodness. I really appreciate how Bishop Barron and his team incorporated reflections, explanations, word study, art, even poetry, to accompany the Gospel text. I enjoyed slowing down and taking my time to read everything on each page.

While the takeaways were many and I hope to write about more of them, for this Easter Day one thing in particular stayed with me. Early in Matthew’s Gospel he describes his calling to follow Jesus. Matthew was sitting at his collections table, most likely surrounded by others. Jesus singles Matthew out of the crowd and simply says, “Follow me.”

Matthew says he, “rose up and followed him.” End scene. There isn’t much in these few words. However, there is so much when you know ancient languages! I do not so I, like so many of us, rely on others to illuminate what is hidden in our English translation. When Matthew says he “rose up” or in some translations, “got up,” the specific verb he uses is anastas. Not so coincidentally, when we fast forward to Jesus’ Resurrection, the same root word (this time anastasis) is used by Gospel writers to describe the phenomenon.

Jesus, as we know, rose up transformed. His disciples did not always immediately recognize Him. He could walk through walls and locked doors. He was Jesus, yet He was fundamentally changed, something new that had never before been in the world. Looking back over his life, Matthew recognized that his own call by the Lord marked something significant. He had been changed to the core in that moment, a complete transformation from one man to a new man. A resurrection with a little “r” that points toward Jesus’ redemptive Resurrection which transformed the world.

How much of the Bible do we miss in these little word nuances? I am so thankful for the Bible editors and translators who take the time to shed light on the text for those of us unable to access the original languages.

As you celebrate Easter today and throughout the next week, perhaps take some time to look back on your own life. Have you had a moment where you “rose up” to follow Jesus? How has your life changed because He has called you? And make no mistake, He has, He is, and He will always be calling you to further transformational relationship with Him.

Book of the Dead

Published on by Kate1 Comment

When I met Ben’s family, one of the stories that I heard about was his grandfather’s “Book of the Dead.” If he had a bad experience at a restaurant, gas station, you name it, often it went into the Book of the Dead. Meaning he would not go back. There was one restaurant that he didn’t go back to for something like 30 or 40 years because of the poor service he had experienced all those years earlier. When I asked Ben what the name of the restaurant was, his response was, “Which one?”

Ben’s mom still jokes about this and has her own version of the book of the dead. When we move to Kansas this winter it will be the first time she and his dad have driven in the state since the Ice/Wind Storm of one of his childhood trips to Colorado. Fingers crossed Kansas doesn’t get a double entry!

I have recently begun using the Hallow app. The app is full of Catholic prayers, resources and meditations. It’s very peaceful and has a multitude of ways to engage in prayer. There are psalms, homilies, guided silence, and Lectio Divina. I have been trying to do the guided Lectio Divina each day as well as a Divine Mercy Chaplet. I will be honest, one of the things I really like is the timer feature. For nearly every experience you can choose how long you want it to be. If I know I have time, I can do my Lectio for 30 minutes (I haven’t actually gotten to do this yet, but it’s nice to know the option is there for someday!) Or, if I know the kids will be awake soon, I can set it for only 5 or 10 (what usually happens).

The Lectio passage from a few days ago had some interesting words to say about life and death. It was a short Gospel, and to be honest it isn’t one I’ve really noticed before. The meditation was on Luke 20:37-38. This passage is part of a longer story where the Sadducees are trying to trick Jesus into making judgments about what happens after people die. Jesus, of course, answers their question in a way they don’t expect and wins the day.

Part of His answer was to point out that God is the God of the living, not the dead, for “to Him all are alive.” I had to stop and really think about that for a minute. No one is dead to God, for even the dead on earth are still living souls in eternity. Their bodies may be gone, but their soul remains forever.

This, I believe, is big news for the past year. How often have we heard people (ahem, and maybe our selves?) exclaiming that they want this year over, that it’s time to move one, that it’s dead to them, or in Ben’s grandpa’s words, ought to be put in the Book of the Dead? But no, this isn’t what Jesus wants us to do with the year we have been given!

There has been pain, suffering and death in this year. Fact. We cannot sugar coat the tragedies, the sorrow and the large sacrifices that have taken place all over the world. Many, if not most, people have personally encountered the pandemic’s devastating effects on their families, friends and workplaces. It has been a hugely difficult year. But that doesn’t mean it should be written off, left for dead or abandoned.

Jeff Cavins has an excellent book, When You Suffer: Biblical Keys for Hope and Understanding, which I highly recommend (I posted a review of it a while back if you’re interested in checking that out). Cavins fully acknowledges that suffering is painful, challenging and a universal truth of human existence. Everyone suffers. But, as Christians and especially as Catholics, suffering is much more than this. It is also an “immense treasure” because of what we can choose to do with our suffering (pg 157). Quoting Fr. Mike Schmitz, Cavins asserts: “Suffering without Christ just hurts. But suffering with Christ can transform the world” (ibid).

Many of us have experienced suffering of a new level than we have previously. We have suffered isolation, loss, loneliness, sacrifice and more. But do not let that be the end of the story for 2020. Suffering united with Christ’s passion, using the power of our suffering to grow beyond ourselves and offer it for the suffering of others, and other tools Cavins explores in his book are all ways to discover the transformative potential this year has given to us.

With Advent at our doorstep, a new liturgical year is dawning. Advent is an excellent opportunity for focused spiritual reading, intentional prayer time, and closeness with the Holy Family. If you are able to find a copy of Jeff Cavins’ book, I very much recommend it to everyone. Don’t forget about the free Advent journals I have created for your personal use as well. They are still available and will always be free to print.

I hope that you had a joyful Thanksgiving, even if it was a smaller one. If you haven’t already, this weekend is a beautiful opportunity to take some time to write down what you are grateful for this past year. It’s easy to think of negative things first. Give yourself time to really dig into the year. Go back through your planner, your Facebook or Instagram accounts. What brings a smile to your face? When did you have a sense of peace, of happiness, or contentment? This is also an excellent way to begin preparing for the Advent season.

Wishing you and yours a Happy Thanksgiving weekend and a blessed First Sunday of Advent.

Daily Graces. kktaliaferro.wordpress.com